When we undergo change, whether it be wanted (such as taking a course) or unwanted (such as the loss of our child), we experience many insights and learn a lot too. This year has been full of change for me, and my family also. We knew in advance it would be that kind of year.
And so, given it’s November, and the end of the calendar year is rapidly approaching, I reflected upon all I had hoped to achieve this year, whether I’d achieved it or not and what I had learned.
I also took time to notice the things that were ‘bonus’ learnings. You know the type of stuff – the things you’ve learned in the past year that you didn’t know you had to learn. They aren’t always planned, and they are aren’t always part of the plan (this is especially so when it's unwanted change). And the bonus learnings aren’t always big things. But our experiences and what we take away from those experiences can be the most memorable of our year.
Undertaking a Life coaching course is an experience
As regular readers will know, I have undertaken and completed the Beautiful You Life Coaching course this year. Completing a qualification in life coaching was something I’d been wanting to do for more than a decade! Late last year I realised that being a life coach who helped other bereaved mothers honour the child they lost, would be MY way to honour my stillborn son.
And so, I enrolled and prepared in the course I felt would be best aligned with my values; the Beautiful You Life Coaching Course. I thought I knew what I would get out of it (a life coaching qualification), but there was so much more that I learned and gained through the experience.
My 4 biggest learnings from the course
1. The importance of trusting your intuition
I already knew this, deep down. But throughout this course, our wonderful trainers, (and the other trainee’s) actively encouraged us to access our intuition, tap into how we wanted to feel and what our clients wanted to feel, go with what felt right and trust that by listening to our intuition we will know what we need and desire.
As a coach, and as a parent, this reminder was my biggest and best rediscovery. Having spent most of my adult life thus far working in the corporate world, I felt like my intuition had been in hibernation. Learning how to really listen to it, and trust it again was a big change! The icing on the cake was realising that when I step away from being analytical all the time, I have deeper insights, more meaningful realisations and much better connections with people.
2. The power of knowing yourself
Ah this is a biggie! We all think we know ourselves, right? Of course we do. We are in our own heads and bodies all the time!
But, one of the big learnings I had from undertaking the course was that there is knowing ourselves, and KNOWING ourselves. What’s the difference?
Initially, knowing ourselves is about what we like, don’t like and so on. But really knowing ourselves is about getting down deep inside us. Uncovering the dark stuff that we try to ignore or push away. Uncovering the real reasons why we might do something, not the surface reason.
Really knowing ourselves is a gift. It’s like giving ourselves permission to bring all of ourselves to the table. No more hiding parts of us.
And that is powerful and life-changing.
3. The strength of having a tribe
Sometimes we don’t know we what we were missing until we find it. As I have written about previously, I hadn’t realised I was missing deep soul connection with other like-minded women until I had it.
Sure, I have many wonderful female friends and a lot of them I have a terrific connection with, and I treasure them always.
But this was different. This was a ready-made girl gang, for grown-ups.
As part of the Beautiful You Coaching course, we had a private Facebook group where we shared, encouraged and supported one another and received support and encouragement from our trainers too. We also had the opportunity to meet in person, which was always special.
The gift of connection and of women supporting other women is so immensely powerful. When we feel we are supported by others, people who really see us for who we are, and ‘get us’, we feel unstoppable!
4. We are always transforming
Again, I knew this one, but it was a great reminder. We are always transforming. What we like, what we enjoy, the people we want to spend our time with, our thoughts and beliefs all change. We transform!
The powerful part for me was actually taking the time to notice this, observe it and acknowledge it. Taking the time to look back at the week, the month or year that has just passed and notice how much you have achieved and have changed over that time period is an eye-opener. So often we forget just how much we have changed until we stop, reflect and consider how far we’ve come and how grateful we are for what we have learned and achieved.
What can you take away from my learnings?
Firstly, the biggest learning might be to take some time to reflect and look back on your year to date.
- What have you learned?
- What insights have you gained this year that were not what you thought you’d be learning?
Give yourself the gift of time to really ponder what you had hoped to achieve this year, and whether you have or not. Through the simple act of reflecting, you may uncover just how much you have transformed this year too.
Learnings, Goals and Making stuff happen?
If you would like to finish this year with a bang, or kickstart next year with a plan, please get in touch to arrange a complimentary consultation where we can talk about how I can help. It could be that a one-off deep dive session held before the new year is just what you need!
Looking for your tribe?
If you have lost your baby, and some time has passed and you are looking for a tribe of parents who understand what you've been through, check out Parents Evolving & Transitioning After Loss.
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